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Receptivity is the new Power

Receptivity is the new Power

I’ve got a new power move for you: becoming receptive to Higher Guidance. Learn a simple reflection practice for letting wisdom flow into you—because you can’t chase that kind of deep knowing.

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Navigating rage, with Love.

Navigating rage, with Love.

Rage is part of the human experience. And like all of our light and shadows aspects, it deserves to be honoured. And If we look at it with compassion, it won’t blind us.

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Nothing leaves until you love it

Nothing leaves until you love it

There’s so much that we want good n’ GONE. But here’s the thing: nothing is leaving your life or your thought patterns until you give it the light of your consciousness—your love.

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I hope you will forgive me

I hope you will forgive me

In the personal development realm, discussion around Forgiveness tends to focus on us Forgiving the other person for what they apparently did. But what about asking for Forgiveness?

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15 Water-honouring ways to create more energy flow in our lives

15 Water-honouring ways to create more energy flow in our lives

I’ve been focusing on my relationship with the 5 elements, moving into my capacity to offer healing as the Earth heals me. A mutually supportive relationship. It’s been really nourishing to approach each element as a relationship that I have something to bring to––and what I can bring is reverence.

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Harmlessness and Speaking Truth

Harmlessness and Speaking Truth

Harmlessness as a virtue––as an embodied energy, may be one of our most demanding calls as a species. It’s a commitment to the Universal Truth that can be hard to uphold.

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Does “Inner Peace” sound boring to you? (Part 1 of 2)

Does “Inner Peace” sound boring to you? (Part 1 of 2)

I used to think that Inner Peace was a boring proposition. If I was to transcend my ego-needs, what would I have to leave behind? Where would excitement come from? And passion, and the thrill of accomplishment? (The ego-mind lives for being productive. And if you’re not highly productive, the ego guilts you out for it.)

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A prayer for ALL of us. Pray it loud this holiday (or anytime).

A prayer for ALL of us. Pray it loud this holiday (or anytime).

Your family members are going to be who they are most of the time. There’s so much sanity to just letting yourself flow with someone else’s predictability—their norm, their nature. Accept it. Forgive it. Just tolerate it; or peace out if you don’t want it in your life. But don’t waste too much time wishing you could change it. Bless it.

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Forcing opinions or earning wisdom

Forcing opinions or earning wisdom

We can soapbox, we can motivate, we can even convince people to see and do things our way. But even if someone chooses the more “evolved action” you’re suggesting, it doesn’t mean that they’ve just taken an evolutionary leap.

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Rest to become wiser

Rest to become wiser

At the end of a big cycle of output, you’ll probably be pulled with equal force in three directions: cleaning up, stillness, and newness.

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Strategies for CALM power

Strategies for CALM power

Your Heart is GENIUS. But she’s hard to hear when we’re shouting out goals, looping in comparison thinking, striving to be more spiritual… and… and… and… Slow down, love—your Wisdom has a message for you.

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success is a surprise party

success is a surprise party

Give it your all. Give it away. Your desires are being held in the hand of the cosmos with incredibly sturdy care. Life is not testing you. She is rooting for you.

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3 skills for empowering youth… and ALL OF US.

3 skills for empowering youth… and ALL OF US.

What if the educational system got an overhaul with… loving kindness and enthusiasm? We know it needs it. Here it is, embodied. Please meet Mr. Donovan Taylor Hall (@donofriend on Instagram). He’s a youth (and parent) coach helping kids build a positive relationship with themselves through 3 key skills: gratitude, growth mindset, and self talk.

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Been burned? Betrayal, denial, and the bloody beauty of it all.

Been burned? Betrayal, denial, and the bloody beauty of it all.

I’ve been betrayed — severely. Thank God. Betrayal is such a defining experience — it lays your heart bare, and that’s a bloody, good thing. Bloody good.

Being betrayed by another person is often (not always,) a reflection of how you were betraying yourself. It’s a lie looking back at you.

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The union. The bliss. The bind…Friendship is EVERYthing.

The union. The bliss. The bind…Friendship is EVERYthing.

I want to go deep into this conversation about creating Fulfilling Friendships. I’ve got lots to say about engaged listening, self respect, breaking up (when necessary), and celebrating our friend-loves. I’ve also got plenty of opinions and practices for self-compassion, deep spiritual devotion, healthier relationships with our damn phones, and better quality sleep.

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The Manifesto of Encouragement

The Manifesto of Encouragement

Right now, there are Tibetan Buddhist monks in a temple in the Himalayas endlessly reciting mantras for the cessation of your suffering and for the flourishing of your happiness. Someone you haven’t met yet is already dreaming of adoring you. Someone is writing a book that you will read in the next two years that will change how you look at life…

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See you Thursday ✨

See you Thursday ✨

We talk WORTH—“worthiness” is working overtime to cover up a big, egoic lie. We’ll shine a bright light on it, and steady ourselves in Divine Wholeness. This is a BIG, DEEP, GORGEOUS TOPIC. LIFE STUFF.

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Inadequacy is a sham.

Inadequacy is a sham.

The Lie of Inadequacy says, “You were born defective, not good enough, flawed.” Ha ha! Not even close.
Inadequacy is an ego sham—an exhausting lie. If we buy it, we can get stuck in the worthy/unworthiness loop.

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Self respect is a spiritual practice.

Self respect is a spiritual practice.

We fight for causes, for relationships, for our children, for our co-workers… but it can be terrifying to fight for ourselves. This is where sisterhood is particularly powerful. When our girlfriends see us over-extending, and they look us in the eye and say, “Stop. You don’t need to do this.”

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What it really means to go with the flow

What it really means to go with the flow

Going with the flow isn’t about being passive or laissez faire. It’s not about just letting things happen “to you.” It’s not aimless wandering. Going with the Flow is a co-creative act.

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Quizzy: What’s your planning personality?

Quizzy: What’s your planning personality?

The 2021 Desire Map Planner is a gratitude journal, meets calendar, meets your Higher Self. Next to your schedule are prompts and practices to remind you of the bigger picture: your heart. First time with this planner? Take this quiz…

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Is that true? Practicing DISCERNMENT…

Is that true? Practicing DISCERNMENT…

The ability to discern isn’t a purely intellectual faculty—it’s the benefit of being more identified with your soul nature​.​ And it isn’t a narrowing of focus. It’s actually a wider, more inclusive point of view—as if our hearts were open apertures. When we see more of our whole selves—shadow/light, pain/power, then we can see more of the whole truth around us.

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12 prayers for invoking higher guidance

12 prayers for invoking higher guidance

I always have a prayer or two on my fridge, I tuck them into my day planner, and I like one on my altar. I’ve also folded them into a bunch of rosemary sprigs that I left on a friend’s porch. Easier access for divine connection. Having prayers in view makes a difference to your heart-mindset.

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Unmet longings and the Bride of Fire

Unmet longings and the Bride of Fire

I used to believe that my unmet longings were a punishment. The longings pushed downward to a small loneliness.

I healed some. I learned how to grieve career paths, friendships, partnerships, and children I wouldn’t be having. And, amazingly, grief brought me so much closer to being alive. Grieving for my faded dreams woke me up.

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The Stone-Hearted. The Half-Hearted. And the Full-Hearted.

The Stone-Hearted. The Half-Hearted. And the Full-Hearted.

The Full-Hearteds will be called crazy, idealistic, rebellious, too soft, too New Age, irrational, impractical, so angry, disloyal, righteous, moralistic, idealistic, unrealistic, unreasonable… and (gasp!)… utopian. It won’t be the first time, it will not be the last. That’s more than alright. This moment was made for the Full-Hearteds to let love rule. We see the beautiful ideal and we know that we’re all a part of its unfolding.

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The Initiated Woman

The Initiated Woman

The Initiated Woman has bled. She’s bled from blind decisions that sliced her esteem; she’s bled from unguarded boundaries being obliterated; and she’s bled willingly, with love, because that’s what you do when people you adore are anemic or they’ve been punctured by life—you give them some of your blood. Here, I have lots, it’s fresh and warm. I’ll make more.

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What we can—and can’t—control.

What we can—and can’t—control.

What you can’t control:
The weather. Mean people. How people interpret history. How people interpret you.
What people think about anything and everything. What people say to you. What people say to anyone else. Who or what anyone loves. How anyone feels about anything.

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A prayer for transmutation

A prayer for transmutation

The Prayer of St. Francis

Lord, make me an instrument of Thy peace;
Where there is hatred, let me sow love;
Where there is injury, pardon;
Where there is error, the truth;
Where there is doubt, the faith;
Where there is despair, hope;
Where there is darkness, light;
And where there is sadness, joy.

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The most powerful possible Yes to women

The most powerful possible Yes to women

…to the dark, the spacious, the sweet, the jaded, the women who live as certain as light rays,  who renovate broken boardrooms and policies with justified anger and overwhelming Love—
Love of inclusion, of ecology, of bone solid Truth—Love of Love.

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Art is now a matter of urgency. #unityconsciousness

Art is now a matter of urgency. #unityconsciousness

“You know what’s going to come of this moment in history?” asked Lauryn Hill. What?! Injustice, division, collusion?

“Beautiful art,” she said. “It’s happened before, and it will happen again. People’re going to make things. Artists make art from struggle.”

Her gift to everyone that night was firm Faith.

She alchemized fear into a higher vision. Like artists do.

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Feral Together

Feral Together

Everyone foraging for the happiness that was always right there to be had.
With unlimited stillness we are all feral, finding home.

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Sacred reprioritization

Sacred reprioritization

If the majority of the world slowed down because of one unifying singular crisis event… would THAT be enough for you to give yourself a break?

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Your initiation into Grace

Your initiation into Grace

Grace holds tension. Between joy and sorrow; sanity and falling apart; the past you’ve outgrown and your radiant future. Grace balances “bothness.” She is spiritually mature. She turns pain into power.

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Dying for Love

Dying for Love

This is the call in our global pause: to let go of old ways so that a beautiful ideal can emerge––from each self to our social systems.

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Grace for Impact. My new podcast series. (Trailer inside.)

Grace for Impact. My new podcast series. (Trailer inside.)

Grace for Impact is the best of my love, my training in scenario planning and future studies, and my Faith. I was intending to write a book next year called, Things I Do When I’m In Pain. Here it is. This poured out of me in a week. It’s not perfect, but it’s on time.

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HEART CENTERED membership is open now

HEART CENTERED membership is open now

Many of us are riding multiple waves of emotion a day. I’m inviting you to keep bringing it all to your heart space. When I’m swimming in uncertainty, bringing EVERYTHING into my heart space is how I get steady. The heart is THE ISLAND we want to live on.

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The Mother Wound and Father Wound

The Mother Wound and Father Wound

The “Mother Wound” and the “Father Wound.” Loaded labels floating around the self-help circles. I have a suggestion… Let’s go deeper with this while respecting our experience, and not causing unnecessary harm to others.

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New podcast ep! Heart + Head Leadership with Marie Forleo

New podcast ep! Heart + Head Leadership with Marie Forleo

I’m back in podcast mode—and I brought a friend! Marie Forleo. Forleo and I have huddled many a time about creative conundrums and opportunities. I trust her smarts. Her book, Everything is Figureoutable, entered the NYT bestseller list at #1. Because that’s how Forleo does things—impeccably. And her yearly marketing and business development program, B-School is about to roll out.

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“This is what I’d do if I were you,” I said…

“This is what I’d do if I were you,” I said…

Before I was a working author, I did one-on-one strategy sessions with (mostly female) entrepreneurs. “Fire Starter Sessions.” It was $1000 for a 90 minute session and I think, on the whole, people got what they came for and a bit more: idea clarity, a sequenced path, and pragmatic encouragement. I was very clear, “I’m not a coach, I’m a strategist.” I gave people what *I* wanted in terms of business council—straight up advice. Seasoned, sincere wisdom.

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Growth phases—for conscious entrepreneurs.

Growth phases—for conscious entrepreneurs.

Exploitative capitalism is tapping our life force. Conscious enterprise is one of the most powerful vehicles for restoring our vitality.

If you want your work to matter… If you want to get more money in the door so you can live more—and give more… Then you have to learn to leverage online tools. And connect with people who know this terrain and take its high roads.

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This is not a course. This is a nourishment system.

This is not a course. This is a nourishment system.

I know that your heart burns with sacred love.

I know you. Because I’ve been you. I am you. I also know how to turn procrastination into a power move. And I know how to keep waking up without beating ourselves up. (Steady devotion. Deep compassion. Joy leaning.)

Stay with me. 

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3 very big lies we fall for on the way to waking up.

3 very big lies we fall for on the way to waking up.

We’ve got to fall for some lies to get to our truth… These are the lies that dogma, false power, and all kinds of commercial industries are built on. And many of us have built our spiritual lives on one of these shaky foundations. This is a wake up call.

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When (not) to give up

When (not) to give up

This episode is full of contradictions, so if you’re looking for a straight shot—it’s better to look within. As always. I start in the realm of general life stuff, then we move into the deepest possible query: choosing to stay alive.

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The Principles of Flow. And how to ride it.

The Principles of Flow. And how to ride it.

When we say, “We’re going with the flow,” what we’re really saying is that we’re riding The Creative Principle. The stuff of LIFE FORCE. Flow isn’t New Age chillaxin’—it is alert relaxation. Wide awake trust. When you’re in the flow, you’re constantly responding to the subtle cues that Life is giving you.

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When “safe distances” restrict our love.

When “safe distances” restrict our love.

“I’ve gone through my entire life holding everyone at a safe distance… how do I make friends now?” Our fear of judgment prevents us from getting the love that we’re longing for. Twisted, no? But being a stranger to someone doesn’t have to be an impediment to intimacy. This is where courage comes in.

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Naked prayer

Naked prayer

How do you “give it over to God”? It starts with knowing this: your pain is what God is most urgently interested in—like any parent with their child. “Let’s get this healed so you can go out and play.” When we’re brave enough to bring our pain to the surface, The Divine can take it from there.

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On psychics + clairvoyants. To call or not to call?

On psychics + clairvoyants. To call or not to call?

I think external psychic input can be extremely valuable for navigating. I’ve had seers on my payroll. And… We can often sense what’s coming ourselves—we just don’t recognize our own power. Free will, free will, free will. And PS: free will.

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The dance of self-forgiveness

The dance of self-forgiveness

So many of us grip our mistakes because we never want to make them (and hurt anybody) again. But the moving forward can only happen when you can really forgive yourself. It’s possible. And there’s a sequence to it.

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How to be classy when things don’t work out as expected

How to be classy when things don’t work out as expected

Loss brings out our truest self. And while grace doesn’t come naturally to all of us—especially when we lose—it can be cultivated… if you go out of your way to be grateful. Let me tell you a story. It all starts in the ladies room, in a snowy city, five minutes before my curtain call…

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Create a “What I Trust” list. And exhale.

Create a “What I Trust” list. And exhale.

I’ve gotten in the habit of creating a “What I Trust” list before a big gig, or when any situation feels a bit wobbly. Often we’re so fixated on firing up endorphins, we forget that feeling assured and comforted is where the real power is. Calm and centered is magnetic. So… what do you trust?

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Arguing with your inner critic? There’s a much better way.

Arguing with your inner critic? There’s a much better way.

The first thing to do with that inner critic voice is to have compassion for it. (This is counterintuitive because we live in a performance-based culture that thrives on judgement.) Approach with love—then instead of creating further separation from your heart, you’re building a bridge.

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Shadow work:  bringing it into the light.

Shadow work: bringing it into the light.

Self-compassion is the most powerful light source on the inner shadow. Shine it on the full spectrum of your pain (from the ancient to the recent) and keep loving what you find in the dark. This is good parenting for your soul. Keep looking, keep listening, keep loving your wounds… and your radiance—your inherent, never-leaving, second nature radiance—will astound you.

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What’s your relationship to mornings?

What’s your relationship to mornings?

Menus of morning habits are easy to come by (harder to practice). But habits are only bandaids unless we get beneath the surface of our behavior and relating. That’s what most productivity methods fail to ask. What were mornings like for you growing up? What does your ideal morning *feel* like?

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Are we each other’s reflection? Yes. And No.

Are we each other’s reflection? Yes. And No.

Are you attracting jerks because you’re a jerk? Maybe. Maybe not. Sometimes the jerk is there to show you how you do NOT want to feel or be treated—because contrast is one of our most powerful teachers. The flipside: what they may be here to illuminate is how you DO want to feel and who you truly are.

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Q&A One-night Stands

Q&A One-night Stands

Where do I stand on one-night stands? Are they soul satisfying… or just a distraction in your pants? In this episode, I open up about holding out and putting out.

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Spirituality for grown-ups

Spirituality for grown-ups

In “Spirituality for grown-ups” (Eps 1), we’re exploring the definition of spirituality… one that’s more rock ‘n’ roll than religious. More liberating than dogmatic. A definition of spirituality that allows us to be more gentle with ourselves; that embraces duality and nuance; that promotes self-agency, Real Love, and inclusiveness, and JOY.

This episode is especially for globally concerned deep-feelers. If you’re a worrier… you’re not alone. I have my own frets… Am I making myself accessible enough, but still boundaried in a healthy way? Am I effective enough? (I think about this daily.) Have I done no harm? Have I shook shit up sufficiently? The list goes on… because the more of a deep-feeler you are, the longer the list of things you feel. But I wouldn’t have it any other way.

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Some simple tools for best results

Some simple tools for best results

This question came up in a meeting with Desire Map Facilitators + Coaches: “As a creative with so many ideas coming through all the time, how do you stay organized?” My current tools, habits, rituals…

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You do not need to feel “worthy” of what you want in order to manifest it.

You do not need to feel “worthy” of what you want in order to manifest it.

Manifestation is a technology. And like all technologies, I pray we’ll use it appropriately: to generate more loving realities for ourselves and each other. All the material stuff can be fun, and we deserve comfort and ease—without question. But let’s get on with manifesting fresh air, and clean water, and relationships that nourish and heal. And on the way to doing that, self-worth will unfold. We will be manifesting love.

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make it happen

make it happen

When you enter into the deal-making phase—from real estate to intellectual property, gigs to partnerships—it can be like heading into a dark tunnel. The Deal Tunnel. Everyone’s opinions are echoing. Time pressure is on. You reeeeally want to get to the final deal, the light, at the end of the tunnel.

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Spiritual practice won’t stop shitty things from happening to you. However…

Spiritual practice won’t stop shitty things from happening to you. However…

Yoga isn’t going to make you impervious to criticism — because criticism bites. Meditation doesn’t make divorce less brutal — because divorce is rough no matter how it goes down. Green juice won’t keep the creep at work away — creeps like to creep. And prayer will not make your illness less intense to deal with — physical burdens are…burdensome.

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Build strength

Build strength

Build strength through: reflection.
Build strength through: joy.
Build strength through: stillness.
Build strength through: action.

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Naked prayer.

Naked prayer.

I’ve always prayed. To heal. To have. I pray for people I love and people I have a hard time liking. I’ve sat in prayer circles petitioning rain and for someone’s cancer to dissolve. I know dozens of prayers from various faiths. I’ve published prayers. Danced them. Sang them. Sweat them. In reverence, in shock, in exquisite thanks.

I pray differently now.

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5 Q’s for a LUMINOUS new year in business

5 Q’s for a LUMINOUS new year in business

On Team D we think of September as the new January, so a few months ago we dove into business-related retrospection and visioning to get free & clear for 2019. Whenever you’re ready to start fresh, I just posted a short how-to for doing a yearly retrospective on the blog. Five laser-focused questions to prep you for a LUMINOUS 2019!

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Are you at peace with it?

Are you at peace with it?

A choice you make that came with some struggle. To let go. To jump in. To shift your perspective. You did it. You made the call.

How do you know if you’re at peace with it?

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New holiday traditions, to sweeten the chaos

New holiday traditions, to sweeten the chaos

There’s a lot about the holidays I look forward to. The beautiful rituals, and being with people I love, and Jesus (one of my true loves). But… there’s a lot about the holidays in North America that I could do without. So I try to keep this season as gentle as possible. Here’s my way of sweetening the chaos and creating beauty that doesn’t weigh heavy on Mother Earth…

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Soulful, with a side of sassy: Free greeting cards & gift tags

Soulful, with a side of sassy: Free greeting cards & gift tags

I like my holidays to be easy on the over-consumption, big on the real love, with plenty of laughs. In that spirit, we designed these printable greeting cards & gift tags so your holidays can match YOUR spirit. Deep, light, and looking on the bright side. Take your pick, print, trim, and give give give!

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How our business gives back

How our business gives back

When I started my own business, I made a decision to be public about our charitable giving. It was a practice I learned from Anita Roddick and the Canadian-based leaders (all women) of The Body Shop. The Body Shop was my first job-job and it baked the concept of a triple bottom line into my happily bleeding heart. The idea of sharing this is to inspire giving through business. I think we’re all gifters at heart. The flow of allowing and aiding is our natural way of being.

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Comparing your pain to others?

Comparing your pain to others?

Sometimes pain comparison is an act of consciousness. It’s an empowering way to refine your thoughts and create your reality and practiced gratitude. And sometimes…pain comparison only numbs out our truth.And sometimes…pain comparison only numbs out our truth. And when we numb out, we dumb down. We become less conscious, and less useful to those around us. Denying your personal pain won’t lessen other people’s suffering…

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I hope you’re insatiable.

I hope you’re insatiable.

If you’re on your creative edge, you will continuously want more. True desire is full and insatiable. She is appreciative and ceaseless. She is present and she sees possibility everywhere. This is the divine paradox of intentional creating. You’ll love what you’ve got with all your heart today, and you will be ready for more tomorrow… and the next day.

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21 promo ideas. Simple, grand, + the tried n’ true.

21 promo ideas. Simple, grand, + the tried n’ true.

Promo ideas! Simple, grand, + the tried n’ true. Here’s a few…
#1. When you post client testimonials on your blog, include a reply of gratitude.
#6. Join forces with a local artist to make some beautiful stuff.
#11. Start an advice column. Make it slightly hilarious.
#15. Say thank you. Mean it…

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Imagine being better than ever. For reals.

Imagine being better than ever. For reals.

A healer gave me this medicine when I was crawling back to health: You’ll forget it was this bad. I had to stretch to believe her, but I imagined the future that I most deeply and wildly desired. I dared myself to go beyond the baseline of “well” and “recovered” and into the quantum field of truly better than ever.

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Canadian roots. Global love.

Canadian roots. Global love.

In case you didn’t know, we have GLOBAL love for our readers and workshop attendees. Like, three-books-translated-into-TEN-languages kind of love…

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So, is this a gift, or a transaction? Because…your entire life is not a business deal.

So, is this a gift, or a transaction? Because…your entire life is not a business deal.

I’ve been thinking a lot about transactional giving these days. I’ll tweet about you if you tweet about me. They owe me a favour. You listen for five minutes to them so they’ll listen when it’s your turn to talk. Even Stevens. Transactional giving can be a beautiful commerce of support, and there’s nothing inherently wrong with that interplay. But if all of our giving is to secure our getting…then, well, it’s gross.

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I made something new for you. For US.

I made something new for you. For US.

The LIGHT WORK series will unfold over six episodes. These are girlfriend-style sermons on serving the world while staying sane, cosmic connectedness over tech addiction, self compassion and more fulfilling friendships. Poetry. Hilarity. Peeks into the personal.

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Everyone on #TeamD takes these personality tests

Everyone on #TeamD takes these personality tests

One of our best investments of time is in understanding each other: what our strengths and talents are, how we show love + appreciation, and how we respond to stress. We’re working to be even more thoughtful and diligent around these practices in our culture, but we’ve got some great tools in hand.

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The upside of suffering… sort of.

The upside of suffering… sort of.

You see, there is suffering in the sensitivity. It hurts to feel. And we’re raised to strive—to desensitize—and it’s killing us. I think the strength is in opening. That opening to feel is where resiliency is born.

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We can’t get to the light, until we understand the suffering.

We can’t get to the light, until we understand the suffering.

I’ve struggled for a long time with wondering if pain and suffering were essential to growth. Are they essential to me being a more expanded, clear minded, loving, joyous, sexy human being? Do I have to hurt to get there? Well, I fucking hope not… but I haven’t figured out a way around suffering yet.

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The service of joy, especially in these times

The service of joy, especially in these times

I’ve talked to rabbis, and priests, and monks, and people who I consider to be high esoteric practitioners. I’ve figured out a few things about joy… and I’ve woven them into this week’s episode of LIGHT WORK.

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An intimate Q&A episode. It’s deep, it’s lite, I hope it’s alllll right.

An intimate Q&A episode. It’s deep, it’s lite, I hope it’s alllll right.

If God is in the details, then the Soul is in a good Q&A. And that’s the substance of Podcast #4: Beliefs, Movies & Man Crushes. Your questions make it so easy for me to rant and offer some (hopefully) useful how-to’s and tricks of the trade. The “trade” being discernment and devotion. It’s deep, it’s lite, I hope it’s alllll right.

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On Sacred Activism

On Sacred Activism

I’m interested in how we work as individuals and how we come together as a society—to create justice. To be in right action. To balance the scales. To transmute darkness into light. How do we hold people accountable? How do we speak out with fire and clarity about our ideals? How do we call people on their destructive shit without creating harm or incurring karma?

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The Why behind my refund policy, and how small acts of kindness can mean so much.

The Why behind my refund policy, and how small acts of kindness can mean so much.

50% of people don’t even open the digital product they purchased. We want mindful folks who really want to be involved with the product offering. And, refunds are exposing in the digital world. It’s not like returning a chair that the retailer can re-sell… people HAVE the stuff in their possession and could spread it around if they wanted to.
THAT SAID… KINDNESS trumps policy every time.

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Hopefully Devoted

Hopefully Devoted

This is the last episode of this podcast series. It’s devoted to one of my favourite topics: Devotion. We’re shining light on our prayers, our beliefs, our teachers… and whether they’re actually getting us closer to what we really want—liberation. We’re talking about the real work of light work.

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Examining our devotion: If we don’t feel free… what’s the point?

Examining our devotion: If we don’t feel free… what’s the point?

I know that countless mystics throughout time agree that the reason for our spiritual endeavoring—our devotion—is liberation, and only liberation. The “work” in our light work creates a freedom from afflictive states: anxiety, selfishness, shallowness, insecurity, always comparing ourselves to other people, restlessness, fear… If the whole point of our devotion is liberation, then here’s the question…

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3 habits for dissolving envy.

3 habits for dissolving envy.

Can you wish the best for those you envy?
What if your jealousy is a sign that you need to get your ass in gear?

Because, what’s wrong with wanting what you want?

Hint: Nothin’…

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Summoning all cosmic beings for support? It’s better if you just focus.

Summoning all cosmic beings for support? It’s better if you just focus.

You know how when you’re really messed up and you reach out to EVERY friend? You text them ALL at once in case the one person you really want to talk to isn’t responding IMMEDIATELY. And then you feel kind of dirty after because you got all frantic and spread your nuttiness around when really, you could have just connected with your one friend who tells you the truth every single time? I think it works the same way with angels and cosmic guides.

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Dear God, help me out with the basics, would you?

Dear God, help me out with the basics, would you?

Show me how to love the ones that are like, really hard to love. The misogynists and boundary bullies, the fake leaders and land-rapers. Actually, for the sake of efficiency, just show me how to love the most greedy. That should cover it. (But while we’re at it, help me out with the Mean Girls, ‘cause like, whoa.)

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How to hone your truth detector.

How to hone your truth detector.

There’s so much faking it to make it and deception happening in every sector of life — from politics to self-improvement. So how can we hone our truth detectors?

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Women, boundaries, and spirituality. The perfect storm.

Women, boundaries, and spirituality. The perfect storm.

In my experience, boundary obliviousness is part of the initiation into wholeness. I don’t think you have to warrior your whole life for it, but it’s a passage to self-agency that most women seem to have to go through. Boundaries help us expand our consciousness.

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Did you get interrupted on the way to “ideal”?

Did you get interrupted on the way to “ideal”?

Every “image” I had of my “ideal” life has been interrupted, derailed, splattered on the road to this sometimes way too fucking complicated, patience-of-Job, deeply deep and BEAUTIFUL life that I find myself in. CORRECTION: I didn’t “find” myself here. I made choices to be here –– right where I am. One choice at a time. Every time you choose to go for a “feeling” instead of an “image”, you’re making a courageous choice.

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The first step to take when you’re in hell.

The first step to take when you’re in hell.

It feels interminable. Like you’ll never get out. Like it’s never…going…to…end. That’s the nature of hell. It’s not the pain that drives you insane, it’s the fear that the pain could go on and on.

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But what’s the MOTIVE? (And BTW, pure motives RULE).

But what’s the MOTIVE? (And BTW, pure motives RULE).

But what’s the MOTIVE? (And BTW, pure motives RULE). Same gesture. Same joke. Same service. Same policy. How can you spot the selfish intention when the branding is so glorious? Or how can you sense the true wisdom when the delivery is so 2000-and tacky? How can you really hear someone when your judgement is clouded by…judgement?

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It’s not always self-sabotage. It’s just…what it takes.

It’s not always self-sabotage. It’s just…what it takes.

Lightwork can be a fight. If you think being on the “spiritual” side of progress guarantees you harmony, then either you haven’t been at it long enough or you’ve been playing it safe. Harmonizing, healing, serving, shining…it’s messy work. Beautiful. Worth it. But messy.

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Are you tired? Or just really (justifiably) angry?

Are you tired? Or just really (justifiably) angry?

Of course there are times — perhaps entire years, when we are bone-baked exhausted. But being fed up is not the same as being fatigued. In the seasons when we are vivacious and brimming with life, we can’t let ourselves slip into the reflex of heaviness.

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The lie of inadequacy.

The lie of inadequacy.

We’ve got to fall for some lies to get to our truth. The Lie of Inadequacy. It goes like this…“You were born defective, not good enough, flawed.” nooo! Erase erase. Blow it UP.

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[VIDEO] You are the Guru

[VIDEO] You are the Guru

NOBODY knows better than you what’s right for you. NOBODY. Let me say what I really mean: NOBODY.Advice? Get some. Oracles? Consult them. Friends? Worship them. Actual gurus? Honour them. Final say? YOU. All you. No matter what.

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The best self-help is self-compassion.

The best self-help is self-compassion.

The best self-help is self-compassion. When you give yourself credit for making it this far in life—and still being a Gentle Soul—then you’ll know the Truth of Love. When, in a courageously still moment you hear yourself say, “I have everything I need right now,” then you’ll know the Truth of Faith.

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Reframe your wisdom.

Reframe your wisdom.

Your breakthroughs have more to do with your own power than that of the expert or the authority. Wisdom is built, not bestowed.

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It only gets more painful. But it’s good news.

It only gets more painful. But it’s good news.

It only gets more painful. But it’s good news. I thought that the ability to feel more deeply would give me access to solace, that special area reserved for The Feelers. But as it turns out, I just get more adept at crying and then carrying on.

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Look for the Light everywhere

Look for the Light everywhere

Look for Light with more intensity than ever. In all the density and confusion that’s swirling on the planet, this is what it means to have Faith—Faith that you’ll keep finding Light. But you have to keep looking.

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Look for the Light everywhere

Look for the Light everywhere

If you’re being your whole, real, true, GENUINE, “authentic” self…you are going to be a walking, talking, tweeting, PARADOX. This is a good thing. Because WISDOM is paradoxical.

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Why positive thinking might be leading us in the wrong direction.

Why positive thinking might be leading us in the wrong direction.

Deep positivity.
If there could be a slogan for manifestation theory, this would be it:
Energy follows thought. Energy follows thought. Energy follows thought. And by the way…energy follows thought.

Manifestation happens from the mind.

For it to work effectively, you must achieve clarity of desire, root into the depths of positivity, fend off doubts with Faith, and repeat. Every minute of every day, give or take.

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How to be truly wise? Rock your paradoxes.

How to be truly wise? Rock your paradoxes.

True wisdom usually holds and transcends opposing points of view. Wisdom knows that there is always an exception to the rule, that there is a time and place, and that a case-by-case approach is divine protocol.

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[VIDEO] A warning about shady lightworkers…

[VIDEO] A warning about shady lightworkers…

A warning about shady lightworkers… Healers, magicians, followers…so much can go wrong. There are spiritual superhumans and TRULY luminous leaders. Some people DO work for the Light, others…others do their work in the shadows and make it look shiny.

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THE LIE OF AFFILIATION. Or…why group-think can really suck.

THE LIE OF AFFILIATION. Or…why group-think can really suck.

THE LIE OF AFFILIATION. The Lie of Affiliation says, “Groupthink is good think.” We could also call this The Lie of Being Cool. Join me for lunch on Facebook Live tomorrow [12pm PST/ 3pm EST] and we’ll bite into the dynamics of group-think (it can really suck) and I’ll do Q&A!

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I want you to love and trust yourself more intensely.

I want you to love and trust yourself more intensely.

So White Hot Truth is about questioning our quest. Not so that we can get all debaucherous (tho’ that might be exactly what your spiritual evolution requires at the moment. In which case, go for it.) so we can craft a spirituality for ourselves that feels inspired and liberating — instead of a checklist for getting holistic and moral approval ratings.

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Energy parasites and addiction to chaos…and other things to weed out of your life.

Energy parasites and addiction to chaos…and other things to weed out of your life.

Women and feminine-identified types specialize in beginnings, not endings. We prefer to nurture, not exclude. This of course is spectacular and divine and… challenging. Because destruction is essential to creation. Something has to die for your dream to be born. And by that I mean… you may need to cut off it’s life/lie supply and send it down the river to die.

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Are you feeling the “collective pain”? Here’s how to manage that…

Are you feeling the “collective pain”? Here’s how to manage that…

A lot of us are experiencing our own personal pain AND tapping into global, collective pain at the same time. We’re marching, or emphatically not marching. We’re crying in the kitchen, out of the blue. We’re heavy with emotion by noon.

My loves, it’s critical that you let the pain move through you. You have to keep letting it go. And like, there’s no need to worry about being too detached from what’s going on. Because there’s new pain arriving daily. If you’re awake you will hurt. I’m with you…in profound agony over the state of the world. And, my faith and resolve are brighter than my doubt and stronger than my grief. It’s an hourly practice to find that balance.

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There is nothing passive about “having Faith.” (And how to deal with doubt).

There is nothing passive about “having Faith.” (And how to deal with doubt).

Faith is the “work” in “Light work”. It scrubs and rinses and steadily erases doubt. Faith stays on doubt’s ass: I see you. I dissolve you. I replace you with Faith. And then doubt will pop up again. And Faith is right there: Yep, I heard you. I choose faith. Yep, I know the odds, I choose Faith. And because Faith knows the natural order of things, she says to doubt: You’ll probably be back later this week. And you might even distract me. But I’ll still choose Faith. No anger, just clarity. No complaints, just pure, fiery resolve.

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All of my failures can be traced to my silence.

All of my failures can be traced to my silence.

Truthing isn’t necessarily easier to do, but it brings incredible ease to your life. And the more you do it, the easier it becomes. The courage, the classy delivery, the compassionate humour, it all becomes more accessible when you’re using your voice everyday.

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Will you do as much as it takes, as long as it takes? 2017 is asking.

Will you do as much as it takes, as long as it takes? 2017 is asking.

Listen. It’s time. This is it. 2017. New. Year. Now. I for one am going deeper and higher. I’m reaching inward for my strength, facing my Soul, and I’m going to pour my devotion to the Light all over every word I speak, and every human I encounter and adore and hold, and every cause I’m working for.

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How you listen is how you live. (A poem for being of service.)

How you listen is how you live. (A poem for being of service.)

You may hear this as an order, an invitation, or as the opportunity of lifetimes.

How you listen is how you live.
Can you hear the women crying?
Can you hear the soil gasping for clean air?
And did you hear that? That’s the sound of a good man asking, How can I serve?

How do you serve?

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Rock your emptiness

Rock your emptiness

But what if we rocked our emptiness? Felt the perimeter of ourselves. Relished the silence. Made friends with the peace that’s always waiting for us. What if we got off on the discomfort of our emptiness and let it be creative tension?

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What’s underneath wishful thinking?

What’s underneath wishful thinking?

Wishful thinking is tangled up with craving. We want what we want. So we ignore the evidence that we’re very likely not going to get what we want out of a situation. Craving… wishing. Craving… denial. Craving… tolerating. It’s a wishous cycle.

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Why jerks show up in your life.

Why jerks show up in your life.

We attract jerks to burn karma — old agreements to be broken in current time, vows to be rescinded, slates to be wiped clean. We attract jerks for contrast — jerks show us what deception and manipulation feels like. They show us how we DON’T want to feel — which is excellent intel for knowing how we DO want to feel.

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The epidemic of the brittle woman and the salvation of softness

The epidemic of the brittle woman and the salvation of softness

You know her. Maybe you are her. Or you were. Sisters, please don’t become her. Sisters (and brothers), let’s heal her. She’s giving up on love and life. Sometime, as a result of having to try too hard to get her very essential Soul needs met she… just… got… worn…down. She had no choice but to stiffen. Then she realized that she had a choice.

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You’re going to feel guilty

You’re going to feel guilty

The guilty feeling associated with desire, with going after what you want, with transforming….you know that feeling? It’s like tar on your mojo. Maybe you were raised in an environment where desire was considered a negative thing. Or your social circle constantly reinforces the message that you shouldn’t dare to bust out. And maybe you frequently feel guilty for wanting what you want — and you know that it’s causing blocks in your life…

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Love your sadness. It won’t last.

Love your sadness. It won’t last.

I was feeling it. Pure sadness—the inescapability of it plowing through the softest part of me. When you’re in that kind of painful place you’ll try to climb the walls to get away from it. You want it over with.

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refuse to worry (and how to be more useful for your friends)

refuse to worry (and how to be more useful for your friends)

Every fearful expectation has a big “story” behind it. The trauma, the drama, the pain, the plot. Worry feeds on the gruesome details. It replays the potential saga in your head. It validates all the reasons things could go wrong by drudging up the past again and again. Worry is cleverly building a case as to why you should worry…

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What to do when things suck. (hint: don’t gloss over it.)

What to do when things suck. (hint: don’t gloss over it.)

When you’re feeling out of your soul zone and something crap is happening…accept that it’s happening. I know. Believe me, I know. This may sound super flaky and totally impossible. And yet…this counsel is at the heart of most Eastern mysticism. Don’t deny what’s occurring. The power to change what’s happening comes from accepting it first.

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the euphoria of admitting when it sucks

the euphoria of admitting when it sucks

I hear this time and again, “If I just hang in longer… Maybe she’ll come up to speed. It might sell in the summer. If I dig deeper, I’ll learn to love Excel.” Fess up – it ain’t workin’. You’re smart to see it. You’re brilliant if you move on…

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Comparison is a killer. Cut it out.

Comparison is a killer. Cut it out.

From the shape of our cells to the swirl of our fingerprints, each human is profoundly, almost incomprehensibly unique. In all the eons of time, amongst trillions of human eggs that have been fertilized and hatched…there is only one you: microscopically remarkable, positively unrepeatable, original, and…beyond compare.

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Use your wings

Use your wings

You’re cosmic. You are winged with light. And that means you have the power to get where you want to go, to see what’s really going on in a situation, to make excellent decisions.

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Recovering from self-help exhaustion? Join the club.

Recovering from self-help exhaustion? Join the club.

My friend Jess Ortner and I had a great conversation about the downer of always trying to be up. Perfect for her podcast called Adventures in Happiness. This is one of my favourite, truly useful conversations for being on the so-called “Path”.

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Fighting for your joy.

Fighting for your joy.

Now that I’m at the most joyful I’ve ever been, (there’s a difference between happiness and joy,) I’m asking: Will I have to fight for my joy again?

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All the things that softly kill me.

All the things that softly kill me.

The hate. All the hate. It makes me fume and spin. The light. Oh the light! The light that is powerful enough to transmute hate into Love. “T’was blind, but now I see.” That kind of light.

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Self Love and why we’re all effed up about it.

Self Love and why we’re all effed up about it.

Celebrate yourself no matter what — even if they think you’re tacky, terrible, too much of this, too little of that. Make how you move through the world an homage to your beautiful, luminous, powerful, magnificent, righteous, sacred…self.
That same self who may fuck up tomorrow, but will still be made of LOVE. THAT Self. Love.

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Easing someone’s suffering…without suffering. Is it possible?

Easing someone’s suffering…without suffering. Is it possible?

Do I have to feel your pain in order to help ease your pain?

And, if I guard myself against your suffering, am I less useful? If I want to detach from your pain, am I less loving? If I think, “I’m glad I’m not going through that”, am I cold hearted? If I’m grateful for my strength or good fortune in comparison to your so-called weakness or misfortune, does that make me…just secretly horrible?

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You girlfriend, YOU. The things women friends do.

You girlfriend, YOU. The things women friends do.

I can be my most very very softest self with you. There isn’t a word in the English language that can convey my gratitude for that.

You have never once made me feel wrong, or wicked, or insane, or not hot — even when I felt all of those things. You always make me feel righteous, and loving, and strong, and totally hot.

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How to be generous.

How to be generous.

Let go of things you think you cherish. A waitress at dinner complimented my friend on her earrings. My very cool friend left the earrings with the tab. I bet that small act rocked the waitress’ world. How much do you really need your stuff? Sometimes we hold onto things for the “principle”. Like say, your bestie loves all things owls but you’re holding on to that owl-embroidered smock that you never wear because your aunt made it. Give it.

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Why we relive the painful times over again. (For a good reason.)

Why we relive the painful times over again. (For a good reason.)

You can see ten more reasons it was a blessing. Or the REAL reason you were hurt. Or, best yet, you can now see how truly powerful, loving, loveable, immaculate, and awake you really are.

Feeling old wounds is the soul’s way of looking for what else can be healed. You’re not a loser for feeling it again, you’re…soulfully thorough.

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Integrity first, then hustle + 10 fresh lessons on money

Integrity first, then hustle + 10 fresh lessons on money

On Team D we ask two questions: #1: Are we in integrity, doing something good and useful? Yes? Great! Then we proceed to question #2: How do we move boatloads of our goodness?

Serving up a fresh batch of money nuggets, from random theories to daily habits.

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Do it for the love

Do it for the love

Money, approval, association — those are each healthy components to pulling off good stuff, but only if they’re rooted in the true love of what you’re doing. First, integrity, then hustle.

No matter what you do in life, whether it’s truly noble or expedient BS, you’re going to sweat for it, you’re going to lose a few battles, get criticised, hit the wall.

There aren’t many shortcuts to greatness, so really, just #doitforthelove.

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Let your joy rise to the surface

Let your joy rise to the surface

LET IT UP AND LET IT OUT. It’s real. Look, if someone can’t handle your enthusiasm, or thinks you’re clingy…well, they just probably won’t — most people drink it up. And if they get all weirded out or guarded, don’t worry about it. Just because someone can’t handle extra love doesn’t mean that your love doesn’t get into them.

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Freedom worships inquiry

Freedom worships inquiry

If you want to live according to the pulse of your soul, to the depth of your desires — to be FULLY ALIVE THIS LIFETIME…then you must devote yourself to be a QUESTIONER.

Why these rules? Why am I feeling this way? WHAT am I feeling? Why did they do it that way? Why can’t I? Why are we doing it this way? Where are we going? Where else has this been? Where does it go when I’m done with it? Why not?

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Self care is a divine responsibility

Self care is a divine responsibility

…and by that I mean…If you believe that you are a child of the universe, or a product of Love, and/or a global citizen, then it’s common sense that you care well for yourself. In fact, you’re honour bound to love yourself.

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Staying fluid, jealousy, and are women too hard on themselves? A Q&A on Womanhood

Staying fluid, jealousy, and are women too hard on themselves? A Q&A on Womanhood

Well, WE ARE SOCIETY, so it’s not an “us against them” scenario. Women are setting and managing their own expectations to a huge degree. So let’s start by looking at how we treat ourselves — how women treat themselves as private individuals, and how women treat women. Let’s start with us.

The German magazine Allegria, asked me some good questions about WOMANHOOD. We could have talked for days…

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No makes way for Yes

No makes way for Yes

Imagine being excited by EVERYTHING that you’re up to. Imagine looking at your day planner and thinking, “My life is so obviously great. OBVIOUSLY.” Imagine feeling incredibly free and empowered.

You want that, right?

Then here’s the password to all that spaciousness and power. One word: No.

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Authenticity is magnetic

Authenticity is magnetic

…and by that I mean…being “real” is attractive, compelling, shiny — respectable. That said, being you doesn’t mean EVERYONE will dig you — we all have different flavours and tastes. But it does mean that your tribe will be able to see you. And the people who are ready to have what you offer will hear you. And the universe will get a very clear signal about what makes you more…YOU. And it will deliver more YOU-affirming things into your life.

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Spill your desire to love and be loved everywhere

Spill your desire to love and be loved everywhere

I’ve had thousands of conversations with people about desire and this is what I’ve learned from them (and from my own fiercely tender fierce heart): Desire is simple.
You can crave it, distill it, and peel back every kind of wish and most get to this: Everyone desires to love and be loved.

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Leave room for mystery

Leave room for mystery

…and by that I mean…there isn’t an explanation for every situation or a solution for every problem. But some of us seekers love to dig dig dig until we find the reason— the past life, the astrological alignment, karma, the energetic pattern.

All those forces weave their way into any manifestation — wins and heartbreaks, illnesses, and miracles.

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You’re free to go.

You’re free to go.

…and by that I mean…stay if you love it. Leave if you don’t.

Honour your life by honouring your time. Start with the easy stuff. YOUR LIFE and YOUR HAPPINESS. Bum them out temporarily or be FULFILLED and FREE? Hmmmm.

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Your body knows before your mind does

Your body knows before your mind does

The body just feels. It doesn’t have a filter of judgements or worry. Something happens and then wham-boom-woosh, INSTANT feeling. INSTANT. Hits your gut, makes you blush, hairs stand on end, heart races, flush.

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Lovevolve Lovevolve Lovevolve

Lovevolve Lovevolve Lovevolve

Find out precisely how your people want to be loved and then…just love them that way. (Take the Love Languages test if you want to dig in to this psychology.) Bend to give the person in your gaze exactly what they need, the way they need it — and guaranteed, you’ll be a better person for that kind of giving.

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28 of the best things I ever did — from my bedroom to my business

28 of the best things I ever did — from my bedroom to my business

1. Started treating my office like it was a real room that was worthy of my best treasures, not the “spare room made into an office”.
2. Drinking hot lemon water in the morning. Great for digestion, skin, alkalinizing.
3. Admitted that I don’t like managing people, and therefore I am not excellent at managing people. Good news is, I’m an excellent leader.

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You’re on the verge of a miracle.

You’re on the verge of a miracle.

A Course In Miracles defines a miracle as “a shift in perception.” I love that, because that definition covers a lot of bases. You can choose to believe in spontaneous healing and create a physiological miracle.

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Procrastination can be a form of intuition.

Procrastination can be a form of intuition.

…and by that I mean: Even type-A personalities and wildly productive grown-ups put things off. But what we might critique as procrastination can be a misdiagnosis for instinct. One of the effects of living in a hyper-productive society is that intuitive resistance can get labeled as procrastination. But…

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Get your halo dirty.

Get your halo dirty.

My favourite monks are the ones who sneak a smoke behind the commissary. “Don’t take it too seriously, Danielle.” I’m a vegetarian who LOVES bacon. Sometimes, some trash talk goes grrrreat with yoga. Lighten up. Live.

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Be Your Own Guru.

Be Your Own Guru.

Final say? YOU. All you. No matter what. Your body knows. Your heart knows. Your mind will help you act on what you know.

Will there be times when you should have heeded external advice? Yep. Plenty of them. But your Soul had a plan. And nobody else knows your Soul’s plan. But you, oh guru.

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Don’t take any shit. (And a few handy phrases.)

Don’t take any shit. (And a few handy phrases.)

…and by that I mean: Your week is filled with a few opportunities to put up and shut up. And where does that get you? Repressed, suppressed, officially oppressed. Not taking any shit doesn’t mean you’ve got to fight or get scrappy — though sometimes, that’s exactly what you need to do — loudly.

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12 Things I know about real deal healers

12 Things I know about real deal healers

And by “necessary hard work” I do not mean: slogging on something you don’t really want to be doing in the first place. This is not about sucking it up or faking it.

By “necessary hard work” I mean: FIRST you commit to something that lights you up, pulls you forward, truly inspires you — the career, a relationship, a project (and YOU can be that improvement project, by the way.)

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You’ll do it when you’re ready.

You’ll do it when you’re ready.

There’s a lot of pressure to be ready now, yesterday, ASAP. Grow achieve push plow crank rank. But you’re ready when you’re ready. Think of all the times you pushed your friends to dump the fool they were with…for years…

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The risky business of being sincere in business

The risky business of being sincere in business

I just moved the closing date of a major business deal for astrological reasons. Our lawyers had already dealt with a lot of back n’ forthing and a last minute twist/untwist. The finish line was in sight, but I was about to yank it. People might be understandably flummoxed. I could have made an excuse for the switch that sounded more, you know, biz legit….

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#TellThemNow. The intimacy of gratitude will blow your life wide open. (+ a Father’s Day video that will have you weeping)

#TellThemNow. The intimacy of gratitude will blow your life wide open. (+ a Father’s Day video that will have you weeping)

One of my least favourite behaviours of mine is withholding love. I’m hugely proud to say that it rarely happens. (If you’re going to boast about anything, let it be your capacity for loving.) But it still happens. It’s a reservedness that creeps over my usually boundless heart. I tell myself that staying quiet will give me shelter (from what?*), but it isn’t shelter at all.

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Current Pain or Departing Pain? How to assess your agony.

Current Pain or Departing Pain? How to assess your agony.

There is the pain you feel because it’s deep in your being, in real time, working on you. And there is the pain you feel when it’s ready to be released. Just when you thought you’d purged it all, your body lurches with one more hurl to make sure the toxins are good an’ gone. That last lurch can catch you off guard. Where did that come from?

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Your Inner Child. (I know, I know. GROAN. But hear me out…)

Your Inner Child. (I know, I know. GROAN. But hear me out…)

I’m hanging with my shrink and he brings up some inner child stuff. My general response: “Really? Come on. You’re gonna pull the Inner Child card on me? That is SO 1994.” And then we laugh, hard, like we do, and he gives his best exaggerated Jew-Bu shrug, “Well, that’s when the wound happens, so it’s like, hard to get around.”

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The password for Beloved

The password for Beloved

There is that place you cannot reach within your singular self on your very own body inside your human person. No matter how you bend or try to scratch it, there is That Place you cannot reach alone.

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The dark side of big goals.

The dark side of big goals.

I should probably tell you now that I’m the kind of person who has very big goals. And if we had tea to jam on your life, and if you had even an iota of ambition, I would probably take that iota and get alchemical with it and blow it sky high. So, I’m the last person to be down on big goals. But I am usually the first person to ask, “So…Why do you want what you want?” Because…

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8 sure ways to block positivity

8 sure ways to block positivity

#2: Ambivalence and indifference. When you’re in touch with your truth, you can make a clear choice. (Personally, I’m always leery of collaborating with someone who doesn’t know what they want. Hell, I’m leery of having lunch with someone who doesn’t know what they want.)

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May my suffering be of service.

May my suffering be of service.

When the suffering is almost intolerable.When you’ve had all you think you can take. When you can’t comprehend what the “gift” in the pain might be. When it’s not making any sense. When you’re asking, God, Life, WHY?

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The inevitable panic that sets in when you let go of expectations. (And why it’s good.)

The inevitable panic that sets in when you let go of expectations. (And why it’s good.)

Absolutely everything is a divine message because life is always calling you. I’m leaning against the fridge in a soul sister’s Brooklyn kitchen. “So Megg, Crocodiles are showing up EVERYWHERE for me lately. Like, everywhere. I’ve got to figure out what the Crocodile totem means. Do you know?” And Meggan gives me her classic eye twinkle and says, “Turn around.” Taped to the fridge door is her boy’s drawing of the day… “Shai’s Crocodile Shadow.” Alright cosmos, you have my attention…

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A What’s Hot / What’s Not list for your business or career

A What’s Hot / What’s Not list for your business or career

If you want to get awesome results, you’ve got to get real about what’s currently not-so-awesome. In the Desire Map process you begin by going through a gratitude exercise, followed by a dissatisfaction review. It’s the whole picture, with a ton of love and no-sugar coating.
In our business, we just started doing a What’s Hot/What’s Not check-in. Our Chief of Staff & People Potential, Steph Corker, officially kicked this off on our last big check-in.

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Resentment. And how to (un)block your prosperity.

Resentment. And how to (un)block your prosperity.

We hold on. Because Love does that. Embracing, rocking, reserving space. Love holds, it treasures, it tucks away for safe keeping, it loyally protects. Holding on is one of the many great powers of Love. To people. To relationships with people. To ideas we had about the people we relate to. We hold on to our bad habits of relating. I’ll be weak so you can feel strong. I’ll be strong so you won’t see me weak. I’ll do it so you don’t have to. I’ll confuse things because if clarity happens, things will have to change.

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The Bright Privilege

The Bright Privilege

Sometimes, my heart is so openI can’t tell if it is a gaping wound or a portal for everything that ever was and ever will be…

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Please don’t punish yourself.

Please don’t punish yourself.

It’s hard enough to make your way in a world where you will be judged, daily. To overcome the intentional punishments inflicted by dark mongers; to find the right concoction for emotional wounds; and to rise from the simply deep heartache of not getting what you want — it’s anything but easy.

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Want more and be kind… and 10 other points on success.

Want more and be kind… and 10 other points on success.

1. Want more*. (Inner peace, greater clarity, outer beauty, awesome stuff — want anything you want.)2. Have an idea, or two or three, about how to get more. Act on that idea over and over again. 3. Hang out with people you can easily adore, or at least respect.

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Destroy before you create. So scary. Sooo effective.

Destroy before you create. So scary. Sooo effective.

Half truths piled on top of half truths do not add up to the whole truth. It’s a just a heap of “not-quite-there-ness.” Grey. Cluttery. If you want satisfaction you have to do the good, hard work of burning down the little lies and resistances. Tear it DOWN.

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Here’s scientific proof that we need each other to shine.

Here’s scientific proof that we need each other to shine.

CREATIVITY. CADENCE. CORE DESIRED FEELINGS. What it takes to make good stuff in the world. Notice when your dream has come true. If you’re addicted to accomplishing things, you might miss the fact that you’ve actually accomplished something pretty awesome.

You probably have notebooks of ideas. You may have ideas you haven’t told anyone about. There are ideas that the cosmos is waiting to tell YOU about it. Stop. Shhh. Did you hear that? It’s your next big idea. Stay still long enough and you’ll hear how to make it happen.

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I implore you: Do not dumb down.

I implore you: Do not dumb down.

You have a gift. It’s your truth. Honour it and it will honour you — with every kind of fulfillment.

I’ve been asked to dumb down. More than once. By bosses. By advisors. By magazine editors. And I have one line for that…

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Coming out of the closet about following your intuition

Coming out of the closet about following your intuition

We work so courageously to hear and heed our intuition, and yet sometimes we lie about following it. We make up “reasons” for our choice that sound more logical and acceptable.

A hunch can be hard to justify to others when the hunch is telling you to choose something other than them.

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Do you believe that life wants you to have what you truly want? Your relationship to prayer, to God, to desire.

Do you believe that life wants you to have what you truly want? Your relationship to prayer, to God, to desire.

I used to pray to sweat blood as a little girl. Dramatic, I know. I was a Catholic schoolgirl, an only child. We rented a small house in a small town, and my parents were young and hip and generally let me do anything I wanted to. The liberal headspace at home, acres of wheat fields to explore alone, and daily Jesus, Mary, ‘n’ Joseph at school made for the perfect environment for me to become the quietly intense mini holy roller that I was. At one point, I used the nooks of my bookcase to create a home for Barbie, and for the Virgin Mary. A leopard-print chaise and a rosary. Heavenly, really.

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Females trash-talking males (and why it’s holding us all back)

Females trash-talking males (and why it’s holding us all back)

“Successful” Female is at the podium. She’s giving a talk on how to be “successful” as a woman in business.

I’ve been to a goodly amount of women’s conferences. So much life and power at those events — and sometimes, unfortunately, a big dose of density. It goes like this…

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Dream death and the real reason you’re in pain

Dream death and the real reason you’re in pain

Dreams that don’t come true need to be grieved. The dream itself needs to be honoured and buried and mourned. It’s not just about dealing with the pain of not getting what you wanted, it’s about going deeper to look closely at what the dream was actually for. This is a subtle concept we often miss in the healing process when something ends. You see, we’re not always sad for the reasons we think we are…

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My travel tips: Rose water, keyboards, peppermint, and mantras

My travel tips: Rose water, keyboards, peppermint, and mantras

I’m on a few airplanes every year. “Few” is a relative term. Maybe a lot of airplanes. And, having five planets in Virgo (tho’ my Sun is in Gemini, FYI), I like things just “so.” I love my systems, my best finds, my compartments, and my comforting things. (This is way less neurotic than it sounds.) Here’s how I keep it all together and cozy on the road…

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Kali’s fire, my life, my love.

Kali’s fire, my life, my love.

Kali came to me on a morning that felt like night. She said, “It gets dark so you can see the fire burn more clearly. Throw it all in. And by ‘all,’ I mean yourself.” Into the fire I put a habit of sadness I was married to. And so then I put in my own singular and true sadness, but not so it would be obliterated, rather transmuted, because I wanted to honour the utility of my delusions, the lies that made for density so that I could see the fire burn more clearly.

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Want to get unstuck? Maybe it’s time to stop analyzing it.

Want to get unstuck? Maybe it’s time to stop analyzing it.

You can work out your family of origin issues, and neuroses, and past life traumas with your shrink or your shaman. You can talk talk talk it out all day long (I know, I’ve done it.) You can trace the cause of your wounds and why you’re so stuck. But at some point, eventually, who cares WHY you’re stuck…

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Come Closer

Come Closer

Desire enchants you to the woods

and has you push through the muck

with the patience of a Lotus.

Come closer.

Search everywhere for your keys.

And then she makes you drive all night, desire,

With no map or insurance.

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Empty your belly.

Empty your belly.

Empty your belly of rage and striving Create! Create! Create! and all the while, be still so you can hear the code of The Beginning.

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My New Life In Golden

My New Life In Golden

Small things. Teeny tiny gentle things. Just one small analogue choice a week can silence, soothe, and interrupt patterns that need positive interruptions. You can do it. You must.

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Playlist: Divine & Spiraling Outward

Playlist: Divine & Spiraling Outward

Longing to be lifted by love… into the slip stream… to the white light… and back to the elemental truth? Then get THIS playlist going. I’m starting to compile mixes according to Core Desire Feelings. This one’s all for DIVINE.

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Your True Nature is Luminous

Your True Nature is Luminous

Light is the most efficient force in the universe. And it’s your very core. Through the chaos, through the darkness, the broken heartedness, we will always circle back to light.
This week is the Week of Luminosity over here. I’m releasing a piece of art in a few days… all for light.

What does “Your True Nature Is Luminous” make you think of?

I asked, you answered.

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A Celebration of The Stop Doing List.

A Celebration of The Stop Doing List.

On the path to defining your own version of success, what you stop doing is just as important as the things you start doing. Read that twice, please. Because this concept could change everything for you — if you let it.

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Busting limitations, and, my new hot tub. They’re related.

Busting limitations, and, my new hot tub. They’re related.

Pace Smith is so good at asking the deeper questions about what it means to do meaningful work in the world. Unlike most “business” interviews, here we talk a lot about deep desire, hit on The Enneagram, make our way to The 99 Divine Qualities of Sufism and slide into the first base of grace.

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The moments that make for burning gratitude.

The moments that make for burning gratitude.

My gratitude for all of this burns in my solar plexus. Sometimes I push against it. I have to consciously breathe it in — choose to expand rather than contract, choose to let it melt any illusions of lack. Mostly, I breathe, and smile deeply, and say Thank you. And then I detach a bit. Because you know, I don’t think I have much to do with anyone else’s a-ha’s. And I just get on with being expressive…grateful…expressive…grateful.

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The Book Club Guide is ready! Desire Mappers…UNITE!

The Book Club Guide is ready! Desire Mappers…UNITE!

“You know gentlemen,” Miten said as he strummed his guitar, “I think this lyric speaks to the masculine, to the heart of our sexuality. It’s what we’re here to give the world, you know. So it’s a bit radical, but would all the men in the audience please stand up.” Silence. All the men in the concert hall rise. The women started looking around, behind our seats, next to us, taking it in, softly smiling, nodding to each other, like, “Well THIS should be interesting.” …

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The journey has to feel the way you want the destination to feel.

The journey has to feel the way you want the destination to feel.

Freedom does not come from a checklist, and a ‘zero inbox’ is not a life aspiration.If liberation is a chore, it’s not really liberation. You can’t contract your way to freedom. You can’t punish your way to joy. You can’t fight your way to inner peace. The journey has to feel the way you want the destination to feel…

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Remember, you said Yes to this.

Remember, you said Yes to this.

You’re choosing – all the time. If you’re slogging away at a job you don’t love, look at it this way: you’re choosing to make a living to pay your rent, support your kids, fuel your dreams. Be in the choice of it — that’s where your power is. You’re in a relationship that’s causing you pain — you’re choosing to be in it. Maybe staying will lead to essential growth, or a break through, or deeper love. Or not. But you’re choosing to be in or out. Be in the choice of it — that’s where your power is.

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Examine your envy

Examine your envy

You just never can know the machinations of someones else’s Soul — their karma, their dharma, their story. Maybe they’re learning precisely what they need to learn in this lifetime to become self-actualized, maybe they’re struggling to get free, maybe they’re an enlightened being who’s come to stir shit up so we can learn compassion. Life only knows.

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Strong, vulnerable men.

Strong, vulnerable men.

Deep and medium tones. Tall, short, fat, fit, straight, gay, brown, white, grey, tattooed. Alone and in chorus. All men. Now the women were catching each other’s eyes in a shared “Like, holy wow,” kind of knowing. And we weren’t just misty-eyed, many of us were weeping — that kind of big-tear cry that you try to muffle by holding your breath because it’s so deep and true, and it’s been living in your body for a long time. Ya, that cry. The women were melting into a puddle of gratitude and respect.

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Use your dissatisfaction to start a personal revolution

Use your dissatisfaction to start a personal revolution

Gratitude, joy, anticipation … all powerful forces for positive mind-states and manifesting goodness in your life. And then there’s dissatisfaction, heartache, resentment. And guess what… those are also powerful forces for positive mind-states and manifesting goodness in your life. Yep. Because those emotions are real. They are part of your wholeness. They count.

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So vast

So vast

My love for you
is larger
than any compass could map.
But like a Queen
with the luxury of time and resources…

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What do you trust? An exercise for strength and mind-cooling.

What do you trust? An exercise for strength and mind-cooling.

Before a big gig or a super-charged opportunity I do a trust ritual with myself. I started doing it on airplanes to cool my mind down after my strategic wheels had been in overdrive. Often we’re so busy trying to get our endorphins fired up to go get ‘em!, we can forget that simply feeling comforted is a very powerful — and useful state of being.

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3 habits for dissolving envy

3 habits for dissolving envy

Can you wish the best for those you envy?
What if your jealousy is a sign that you need to get your ass in gear?
Because, what’s wrong with wanting what you want?
Hint: Nothin’…

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We give what we can, when we can. A very simple story.

We give what we can, when we can. A very simple story.

I’ve been meeting every month with the same five women for seven years. Goddess Night, we call it. Of course it’s a divine lifeline. And of course, we bring food. When we first started meeting my boy was a newborn and my first company was taking off, and I was five kinds of exhausted. I’d usually show up late to Goddess Night. My contribution to a beautiful potluck spread would be like, a bag of chips. Or half a sack of store bought cookies…

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My Upper Limit Problem and how we resist joy

My Upper Limit Problem and how we resist joy

When the stakes are high or when the success is more than you’ve experienced before, Upper Limit Problems can strike. You rain on your own parade. You make a windfall of cash and you get into a car accident. You fall in love and you pick a silly fight. You come down with something before a big moment…

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Your friends, your freedom, and getting off your ass for Love.

Your friends, your freedom, and getting off your ass for Love.

I don’t have many regrets in this life. But of the few that linger, it’s distinctly the times that I missed out on time with friends. The two weddings I didn’t go to because I was too broke for the airfare. (Being late on rent wouldn’t have gotten me evicted. Maxing out a credit card would have done the trick. I could have borrowed the money from … a friend.) The friend I didn’t visit in the hospital because I was on a book deadline. The birthday party I didn’t get to because of a minor inconvenience…

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The story of Freddy & the iPhone — and 4 questions for Creatives

The story of Freddy & the iPhone — and 4 questions for Creatives

I’ve been thinking on behalf of Creatives everywhere. I have some questions for us: What have you got in your archive that can be turned into art today? We’re so occupied with creating new and innovative that we can forget our past experiments or the ideas whose time hasn’t come yet. Remember that one idea you had…? Dust it off now and see if it’s got some glimmer to it….

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We need to know about your joy. (And other conversations of fulfillment.)

We need to know about your joy. (And other conversations of fulfillment.)

We need you to tell us your good news. Tell us how deeply in love you are. Tell us how your life is rocking. How free you are these days. Tell us how wonderful your family is. We need you to light up our realities. Don’t shrink from sharing the story of your good fortune. Give us examples of well-loved living. Give us evidence of the rewards of courage, that it pays to hold out, or to go wild, or to burn prayer candles…

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Permission to NOT network. (And to wear gold pants).

Permission to NOT network. (And to wear gold pants).

Hey hustlers! I’m a hustler, too. Hustling my ideas. I like connections. I like ink. I like open doors. Networking? Loathe it. And unless there’s a dance floor, I always leave the party early. Consider this permission (not that you need it) to not network. We’re going to replace the concept of networking with trust and resonance

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How you can ask for—and receive—cosmic guidance

How you can ask for—and receive—cosmic guidance

Guidance doesn’t have to come as a lightning strike or as a white dove on your fire escape, looking you in the eye. Guidance can be (and I think it usually is), those notions that you can’t get out of your mind. Persistent wonderings, recurring names, places, things—gentle heart cues…

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Why I burned my journals & celebrate my insignificance.

Why I burned my journals & celebrate my insignificance.

I burned about 20 years of journals. Pages and pages of gut-red poetry and angst; cosmic gorgeousness and tender prayers; lists of wants, boyfriends (a loose term), and favourite perfumes. With every page I fed into the fireplace, I smiled. Thank you. Goodbye. Hellohhh here & now…

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The real you is waiting. In here. Not out there.

The real you is waiting. In here. Not out there.

You can’t patch your Soul’s truth together with workshops, and a wardrobe, and identity choices. You’ll likely spend half of your life trying to do just that. Composing. Polishing. Packaging. Facing outward, even though it’s all inward. Eventually, you’ll stop looking out there. In the middle of the noise and the obligations it will dawn on you (maybe right now) that the real you emerges…

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Be The Giver.

Be The Giver.

Sometimes it can feel like dreaming of more than what we’ve got betrays our current reality. As if to wish for something different means that we’re unappreciative of what we have. As if to long for a little less of this, or a brighter shade of that denigrates what stands in front of us.

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Why affirmations can mess you right up (and what to say to yourself instead.)

Why affirmations can mess you right up (and what to say to yourself instead.)

Contrived affirmations take you out of the present. Rather than facing what’s real, we try to plaster over the difficult truths with happy thoughts. This is false optimism and it’s damaging. It undermines our capacity to be with what is, and to access our real strength and spiritual maturity. Spiritual maturity includes the capacity to acknowledge our fears while maintaining our confidence and faith…

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A love letter with autumn soundtrack.

A love letter with autumn soundtrack.

Leaves are falling and it’s time for a letter. I’m in that creative place where the lion’s share of my new work is done, but there’s still much to do. Metaphorically speaking, it’s like the baby could come at anytime, but there’s still the LABOUR about to happen.

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Normal amazing.

Normal amazing.

I have not known Shams or oil wells in my living room.No inheritance, nor near death experiences.
The bird reminds me that Joy is worth dying for.
And that in my house there is so very much to worship…

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Soul soup. (Keep this in mind when you’re falling apart.)

Soul soup. (Keep this in mind when you’re falling apart.)

There will be a time, a passage when you don’t really know who you were, or are, or can be. It’s natural, it’s divine, and it’s the chemistry of beautiful, awesome change. This passage can happen in big dramatic swells, as years of not quite knowing what you want to do; or seasons of confusion that aren’t quite depressing, but confusing enough to invite sadness in…

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The divinity of procrastination.

The divinity of procrastination.

Hesitation can be a form of wisdom. Motives become clearer; new information shows up. Amazing grace can happen when you choose inner rhythms over external pressure.

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What’s inflamed in your inner or outer life?

What’s inflamed in your inner or outer life?

This is a personal question. I don’t expect you to blog about it, or share your answer on Facebook. You might just want to tell yourself, and your best friend, and your guardian angel. What’s chronic, repetitive, or inflamed in your inner or outer life?…

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You’re going to hurt someone.

You’re going to hurt someone.

You’re going to hurt other people. Even though you don’t want to. Even though you don’t mean to. To no fault of your own. You’re going to hurt someone. We’re all bumping up against each other with our cravings and sensibilities, reaching clumsily for fulfillment…

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The positivity of pride.

The positivity of pride.

I have never met someone who is living a bold and successful life—and by successful I mean prosperous, kind, and in touch with the meaningfulness of what theyʼre doing — who has apologized for being perfectionistic, mercurial, unrelenting, or whatever their slightly controversial hallmark characteristics are…

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Transparency is sexy

Transparency is sexy

Care more about being accurately and precisely who you are, than caring what someone might think about you. Be daring enough to tell us—your customers, your fans, your people—about your deep desires and ambitions…

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A question for cleaning your slate.

A question for cleaning your slate.

This is a big topic. Western self-help spirituality is great at getting us to identify our patterns and ‘isms’. After enough how-to books, workshops and therapy we can honorably say, “I’m neurotic because of my mother,” or “I’m a selfish because I didn’t get enough attention as a kid.” But identifying the source of your crap is only half the journey. The other half is composting it into something radically new…

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I know I know you

I know I know you

I can walk down streetsin new cities or be in a stadium waiting for the concert to begin
and I see your face
and I feel
I know you and you and you and you…

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The guy on my street who prays.

The guy on my street who prays.

Every week or so, I notice this guy on my street sitting on the curb between parked cars. Crossed legged. Spine straight. Facing the same side of the street every time. He’s become our urban Buddha statue, reminding us to be still….

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The first thing to say to a friend in need.

The first thing to say to a friend in need.

Well, that sucks. That’s the very first place to start. Sympathy is a healer, it coagulates the bleeding. It won’t drag them down if you validate their pain. It doesn’t mean you condone how they got into the pickle, or the fact that they may be bitching about the same chump after seven years, or that they done gone did it again — or any of that fairly useless judgement and assessing…

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Passion over perfection. Love over politics. The Story of Mrs. Mulvey.

Passion over perfection. Love over politics. The Story of Mrs. Mulvey.

I was in a special English class in high school, the one for the word geeks and bookworms. That was me in the front row with big hair and leg warmers, talking Bronte and Shakespeare. Mrs. Mulvey, my English teacher, was on the outside of my teen drama (and there was a lot of drama back then — I left home when I was sixteen), and we rarely spoke out of class, but how she treated me quietly influenced my entire creative career

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What to ask your mentor.

What to ask your mentor.

They can give you advice. They can try to evoke the answers out of you, help you see the light for yourself. They can coach you to clarity.

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What do you suck at?

What do you suck at?

When you cop to your shortcomings a number of wonderful things can happen. You become more accessible to the people around you, you invite other people to step up and shine, and you create space for support to come into your life — you actually don’t have to be awesome at everything…

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Eventually, you have to stop blaming your parents.

Eventually, you have to stop blaming your parents.

A shrink friend of mine said the most common pattern he saw in human behavior was that people didn’t start really living until their parents died. That’s a lot of lives only one third lived. That plague-of-a-condition stymies us from breakthroughs and realizing astoundingly positive possibilities for humankind. It’s that serious…

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